Thoughts away from home
Whilst away, I was lying on my hotel bed one evening quietly reflecting when I had the thought 'Memories are not enough. Life continues. I need to live in the present.' This made me feel sad as that is all I have of B now, memories. On the other hand, it also made me feel determined - determined to grieve, determined to leave the sadness behind, determined to be able to celebrate all that we had together. Not to forget, that would be impossible, but to continue to live, taking with me all that has enriched my life from our time together. I know that is what he would want for me.
The only difficulty is that, at least at the moment, leaving the sadness behind is still easier said than done! On the plus side, though, I enjoyed my holiday, different though it was, and despite a couple of wobbles. I visited places that I had previously been to with B and I was able to smile as I thought about some of the happy times we'd shared in them. Perhaps, this is progress...
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